Your Sole Existence Is What Drives Me Crazy
by solidsoul
Summary: PostAC. Reno is still struggling when everyone seem to have calmed down, and on an unlucky morning he meets the last person he'd want to see. Reno/Rufus, R&R.


_when the darkness wraps our existence  
i want to crawl into your bed,  
with no intention but to hold you  
and smell your scent,  
I want to feel your pulse,  
and swallow your calm breath_

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A Monday morning felt like any other day for him and the people around him. Everything seemed stable again after the recent events of the remnants and the geostigma, the turks felt and acted in pleasure, Rufus smiled more often and his smiles weren't fake or formal, he truly did smile. Through this circle of these positive turn outs Reno felt bad for being the only one with unstableness in his heart. He wasn't sure why he felt weak and weary more often lately when everybody including his boss were in their best conditions. It was something Reno avoided thinking about, because the more he'd think the more questions he'd face.

"You're up early today, that is unlike you."

The familiar voice was enough to give Reno the shivers, he turned to see the blond standing a meter away. Rufus wore black pants and a buttoned white shirt on, even though It was too early in the morning it didn't stop him from looking his best. _Don't you ever have a bad hair day?_

The president allowed himself to sit next to Reno who had a seat himself on the wooden doorsteps. It was early and the weather had a slight foggy atmosphere to it so the wood felt a little humid. As Rufus' body put its weight besides his turk, Reno almost swore that his heart skipped a beat when he smelled a cologne because it made him realize that the distance between them was quite small.

"Yeah, I kind of slept early last night.." _that's a lie._

"I see. Do you know the date today?"

_The date? How ironic._ The redheaded wondered why would anyone ask him about the date. He thought it was obvious that he wasn't the type of guy who'd keep track of the date and time, he'd always ask Rude and Rude would always know the answer. Reno never felt the need to bother himself with numbers, however, since the recent events of meteor he felt as if his days were years and repeating the date to himself countless times was his poor attempt of hoping that it would move faster. His life had gone through a serious twist since the attack of Diamond Weapon. The position of being ordered, having a superior, Reno may have thought that these were a pain in the ass but it wasn't until he almost lost them that he realized the crucial part they offer to his life.

"It's the 8th of July." _Why? Does it mean anything special to you?_

The blue eyed president looked at his employee with his eyes wide open before they went sharp again as he smirked. ".. I thought you'd say you don't know what you ate for dinner last night". His stretched lips looked so sweet that Reno felt like smiling himself and paused a little before replying.

"Ah, yeah. I do keep track of the days.." The way he replied sounded cold and he knew it. It was impossible for Reno to be himself while Rufus was around. The presence of his boss was enough to drive him crazy, Reno would act and talk in a different and the turks were aware of it.

"Why? Is there something you're looking forward to?" Somehow the pile of question didn't come to an end. Every question seemed like an attack to him and he had to say the right answer in order to keep things in balance. He had to..

"Not really, it was more like I wanted things to move faster." _I'm an idiot._ The tattooed guy wondered as he said the wrong answer for the first time. He shouldn't have said the truth, for the truth would only bring him worries and question, but perhaps deep inside he wanted that.

"…I see. I guess we all wished for certain times to move faster." _..huh?_ That wasn't the kind of reply Reno though he'd get. He paused a little before turning to face his boss.

"….But I must say I'm glad you were counting the days as well." Rufus continued.

The way he smiled after saying that, Reno almost swore to himself that it was as if he's seeing Rufus' face for the first time. His heart started beating faster and he knew that the way his eyes started to move was enough to make Rufus realize how nervous he was. Reno hated being weak, but what he hated more is other people seeing him in that condition.

"Reno," The turk turned his weary expression immediately to face his boss which made him also realize how close they were.

"I didn't tell you this as my turk, but as someone who's close to me." That felt like a hundred bullet in the redheaded turk.

Reno sighed, "..Boss." He said that as he leaned his forehead to rest it upon the blonds' shoulder. The turk realized that he didn't think twice before acting any longer, but somehow that didn't seem to worry him now.

His forehead was completely on Rufus' shoulder. The way he signed, said his boss's name and leaned on him made Rufus conform the amount of feelings Reno keeps to himself. It didn't take Rufus much time before he moved his left hand and placed it on Reno's back. The act made Reno shiver more than he already did, but for the first time, he allowed himself to show it.

They didn't say anything after that, minutes passed but that didn't seem to matter for the two. Reno knew that this might never happen again, his leaning body was enough for him to transfer the pile of emotions he had through these past two years, and not saying anything was much easier for him. The blond showed his signs of accepting these emotions, he moved his hand from his turks' back to the back of his head. Rufus fingers went through the dyed hair and he preferred not to say anything as well.

No one witnessed that scene besides them. It was obvious to Reno that Rufus did not neglect the feelings he received, and that sole conclusion was enough to drive Reno insane. Even though It was early in the morning, the pale turk felt wearisome and he had zero energy to think or move for the rest of the day. He decided to leave the thinking for tomorrow as he closed his eyes to reminisce about what just happened. Yes, he'd think tomorrow.

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**_Hey! this is an old fic by me, I guess when I saw a few recent uploads for those two here I thought what the hell I should upload this!_**

**_I think my writing is pretty dull but I try to cover it up with the content, hopefully it works :/_**

**_please R&R!_**

_**ps: my amazing friend was kind enough to illustrate a part of this story in a gorgouse piece of artwork! ( **_http : // i34 . tinypic . com / ru8qqs . jpg_**)  
**_


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